Part One: The Wormwood
Having spent the previous (couple of) evening/s drinking to wretched excess in the rowdy taverns of Port Peril, neither Inego, Izi or Kree-Kraw are particularly surprised to wake up with a pounding headache. They are, however, most surprised to discover that at some point during their night of drunken revelry, they were all shanghaied by pirates! Specifically, pirates captained by the nefarious Barnabus Harrigan of the Wormwood. Kree-Kraw recognises the bitter after-taste of taggit oil lingering on his tongue and concludes that some scoundrel must have slipped the drug into their grog.
Before the abductees can do much more than sit up and curse their misfortune, they are interrupted by the curious sound of knocking, originating from inside one of the large crates stacked haphazardly against the bulkhead. A moment later, the wooden lid of the box bursts outwards in a cloud of splinters and one distressed and disorientated Dhampir emerges from the ragged opening. It transpires that this sorry creature (Stark) had packaged himself up to be delivered home to Ustalav, only for the vessel he had been loaded onto to be boarded by pirates mid-voyage - and his crate captured as plunder.
Before the abductees can do much more than sit up and curse their misfortune, they are interrupted by the curious sound of knocking, originating from inside one of the large crates stacked haphazardly against the bulkhead. A moment later, the wooden lid of the box bursts outwards in a cloud of splinters and one distressed and disorientated Dhampir emerges from the ragged opening. It transpires that this sorry creature (Stark) had packaged himself up to be delivered home to Ustalav, only for the vessel he had been loaded onto to be boarded by pirates mid-voyage - and his crate captured as plunder.
Izi Yamamato hears approaching footsteps and melts into the shadows beneath the stairs, as a group of ruffians descend from the middle-hold. They are led by a gold-toothed, whip-wielding scoundrel (Master Scourge), who orders the PC's to get on deck, as the Captain wishes to personally welcome his new swabs to the Wormwood. Kree-Kraw gets lippy (or should that be beaky?) and his insolence is rewarded with a smack in the face. Once dawns on Stark that the pirates expect him to go on deck and expose himself to direct sunlight, he starts spazzing out. Clinging to the foremast (like a limpet to a rock), two able-bodied seamen struggle to dislodge the quivering gimp, up until the moment Master Scourge wades in and kicks him in the teeth.
Taking advantage of this circus, Izi sneaks passed Scourge and his goon squad, but soon finds he has nowhere to go and waits to be joined by the others. As the party are herded through the bowels of the ship, they pass a muscular brute chained to the foremast on the middle-hold. When Kree-Kraw enquires as to the fellow's crime, he is told simply that the huge man is Mister Plugg's 'pet'.
Once the PC's have been led/dragged on deck, they are all lined up beside a few other new (and equally unwilling) recruits; halfling bard Rosie Cusswell, career pirate Crimson Cogward, foppish gnome Conchobhar Shortstone and Sandara Quinn, an attractive cleric of Besmara (Goddess of Pirates and Sea Monsters). Izi admires her fine tricorne hat and asks if he can have it. He is disappointed when Quinn denies his request, on the grounds that the hat is a symbol of her faith.
Captain Barnabus Harrigan, a muscular Garundi man with a shaved head, long beard bound by golden rings and an eye-patch, welcomes the newcomers to his crew of cut-throats and ne'er-do-wells before turning them over to his sadistic first mate, Mister Plugg. There are a number of job opportunities upon the Wormwood, the cook needs an assistant, the master-of-sails needs another rigger and no pirate ship can ever have too many swabs. Inego is assigned the position of cook's mate on the grounds that she is a woman and her place is in the kitchen. Bristling at such sexual stereotyping, the Drow duellist is hustled below decks to meet Ambrose 'Fishguts' Kroop.
Taking advantage of this circus, Izi sneaks passed Scourge and his goon squad, but soon finds he has nowhere to go and waits to be joined by the others. As the party are herded through the bowels of the ship, they pass a muscular brute chained to the foremast on the middle-hold. When Kree-Kraw enquires as to the fellow's crime, he is told simply that the huge man is Mister Plugg's 'pet'.
Once the PC's have been led/dragged on deck, they are all lined up beside a few other new (and equally unwilling) recruits; halfling bard Rosie Cusswell, career pirate Crimson Cogward, foppish gnome Conchobhar Shortstone and Sandara Quinn, an attractive cleric of Besmara (Goddess of Pirates and Sea Monsters). Izi admires her fine tricorne hat and asks if he can have it. He is disappointed when Quinn denies his request, on the grounds that the hat is a symbol of her faith.
Captain Barnabus Harrigan, a muscular Garundi man with a shaved head, long beard bound by golden rings and an eye-patch, welcomes the newcomers to his crew of cut-throats and ne'er-do-wells before turning them over to his sadistic first mate, Mister Plugg. There are a number of job opportunities upon the Wormwood, the cook needs an assistant, the master-of-sails needs another rigger and no pirate ship can ever have too many swabs. Inego is assigned the position of cook's mate on the grounds that she is a woman and her place is in the kitchen. Bristling at such sexual stereotyping, the Drow duellist is hustled below decks to meet Ambrose 'Fishguts' Kroop.
Meanwhile, Izi, Stark and Kree-Kraw must compete for the role of rigger, since no-one in their right mind would want to be a swab. The three hopefuls must race to the top of the ships mainmast, the first to reach the crows-nest (60ft above the deck) gets the job. Recognising the lookout's lofty aerie would be an ideal place to roost, Kree-Kraw speeds up the rigging. Izi struggles to keep up with the dexterous birdman and briefly entertains the notion of using magic to arrest the Tengu's progress. Kree-Kraw reaches the crows-nest unmolested and caws triumphantly. His racket rouses the drunken, one-eyed gnome lookout (Giffer Tibbs), who goggles at the birdman in slack-jawed surprise, before reaching the conclusion that he must be in the throws of some grog-induced hallucination.
Having lost the race to the crows-nest, Izi decides that the quickest way to climb the pirate hierarchy is by filling dead men's shoes - or in this instance, the tatty sandals of a sloshed gnome. Convincing Tibbs that Kree-Kraw is more than just a hideous apparition conjured by his addled brain (and that the evil birdman intends to peck out his eyes and devour the sweet, sweet octal jelly), the murderous warrizard waits for the panicking gnome to totter precariously close to the edge of the aerie - before giving him a discrete nudge over the side. Giffer Tibbs plummets 60ft and splatters blood all over Captain Harrigan's nice, clean deck. Stark (who refused to participate in the climbing challenge) crawls over to the body/smear and (to the crew's surprise and abject horror) begins to perform a messy autopsy right there and then. Pulling handfuls of glistening entrails out of the gnomes gaping chest cavity, the Dhampir doctor displays the poor fellow's blackened liver as evidence of the lookout's heavy drinking, which surely caused his tragic tumble to the uncompromising deck. Thanks to Stark's little pantomime, Izi avoids suspicion and the unfortunate demise of Giffer Tibb's is chalked up to misadventure.
While Mister Plugg is impressed by Stark's comprehensive knowledge of diseases of the liver, the Wormwood already has a surgeon (Habbly Quarne, who doubles as the ship's carpenter), so the Dhampir is stuck being a swab. Since the unexpected death of Giffer Tibbs has created another vacancy amongst the riggers, Izi persuades the First Mate to assign him the post.
After the morning's excitement, the PC's are assigned their chores. Kree-Kraw returns to the crows-nest to act as the ship's lookout and Izi is tasked with mainsail duty, while Ambrose Kroop thrusts a fishing rod into Inego's hands and sets her to catching fish for the Captain's supper. As the cook slips into a drunken torpor, his new assistant conducts a thorough search of the galley and turns up a dagger and enough rat poison to really ruin someone's day. Stark is given the job of hauling heavy coils of rope across the ship, a task he complains he cannot complete, as the coarse fibres will blister his delicate skin. Neither Mister Plugg nor Master Scourge prove particularly sympathetic to the Dhampir's plight and eventually they weary of his whining and confine him to the sweat-box.
Come dusk, the entire crew assemble on deck to witness the keelhauling of Jakes Magpie, who was caught stealing from the quartermaster's stores. After being dragged against the barnacle-encrusted hull of the Wormwood, what is hauled from the water on the opposite side of the ship does not bear description. Mister Plugg warns his audience that the same sentence will be passed on anyone fool enough to disobey the Captain's rules.
Despite that gruesome spectacle, the PC's find their appetite undiminished and tuck into their evening meal. Kree-Kraw chats to a surly Rahadoumi pirate, while Izi puts the moves on a squint-eyed old fishwife with no shoes. Stark is released from the sweat-box feeling invigorated after spending an afternoon out of the sun. Mister Plugg wonders if the sweat-box is working properly and if not, did Captain Harrigan keep the receipt?
As evening draws in, most of the crew begin to carouse and gamble and sing lewd songs, while a minority slip below-decks for a spot of care-free buggery. Trying his best to ignore the disturbing noises from the next hammock, Kree-Kraw pokes around the lower-hold and chances upon the peculiar articles that Stark left in his box. The thieving Tengu helps himself to the Dhampir's long coat and stylish, tinted lenses. Meanwhile, Stark is lurking in the dark and foetid bilges, hunting rats with which to sate his monstrous thirst for blood. Inego eavesdrops on Ambrose Kroop and Cut-Throat Grok (the quartermaster) and learns that the PC's gear (stolen when they were press-ganged) is being stored under lock and key in Grok's storeroom.
The next morning, the party are prevented from reporting to duty, when 4 mean-looking pirates (Fipps Chumlett, a bald bully / Jaundiced Jape, mute, albino half-orc / Slippery Sy Lonnergan, weasel-faced scallywag / Aretta Bansion, former prostitute) waylay them in the middle-hold. Kree-Kraw baits Chumlett into swinging the first punch, after making some unflattering observations, re: the man's mother.
Izi shows his quality by immediately trying to plant a boot in Chumlett's balls, only for the bald brawler and his half-orc mate to pile on top of him. He manages to escape the scrum long enough to deliver a punch powerful enough to put Chumlett down for the count. Kree-Kraw trades blows with Sy Lonnergan, while Inego and Aretta flail at one another in a generally ineffectual - yet borderline erotic - fashion (all that's missing is a paddling pool full of jelly). The Drow manages to shove the retired harlot into the reach of the simple-minded giant chained to the fore-mast, who snatches a handful of her hair and reels her in. Jape and Lonnergan break for the deck, abandoning Chumlett and Aretta to their doom. The party decide to delay their retribution until after Master Scourge has called the register - not that any of them would have tried to part Mr Plugg's pet idiot from his new playmate (the brute is stroking the struggling woman's hair as a child would a puppy).
Stark avoided the entire fracas, preferring to cower in his comfortable crate, where it is dark and safe.
Thus begins Day 2 aboard the Wormwood!
As the morning bell rings, Izi and Kree-Kraw scramble onto deck - moments before Master Scourge can challenge them over their punctuality. Inego is less fortunate. As she steps over Fipps Chumlett's recumbent form, the vengeful brute snatches at her ankle, delaying the Drow just long enough to earn her a whipping during that evening's Bloody Hour.
Sandara Quinn beckons the party over to a secluded area of the middle hold and hands them back several items of their personal gear that she was able to recover from the quartermaster's stores (she convinced Cut Throat Grok that the objects were cursed). Kree-Kraw is grateful to have his lockpicks restored, yet the rest of the group remain suspicious that Quinn's apparent act act of charity is not as selfless as she might like them to believe.
Before the evening's meal, Inego Montoya, Fipps Chumlett and Aretta Bansion are lined up to face the consequences of their earlier tardiness. While the lashing that Chumlett and Bansion receive seems lacklustre, Master Scourge really puts his back into Inego's punishment and whips her bare back into a bloody ruin. The unconscious Drow must be carried down to her hammock, where Stark does what he can to ease her suffering.
Several days later, a young swab named Jack Scrimshaw (who seems less of a bastard than the rest of Harrigan's crew) is attacked and bitten by something lurking amidst the Wormwood's cargo. Mister Plugg assigns the PC's to pest control duty and sends them below to exterminate the mysterious stowaway. They soon discover that the middle hold is infested with dire rats (monstrous rodents with the build and temperament of rottweilers), which have gnawed their way out of a crate the Wormwood took on back in Port Peril. The verminous host is just as dissatisfied to find itself upon the high seas as the PC's had been when they first awoke. The party make short work of the dire rats and Ambrose Kroop emerges from the galley to claim the bodies for the evening meal. Stark retreats to a quiet corner and drains the bodily fluids from several of the dead rodents.
Having lost the race to the crows-nest, Izi decides that the quickest way to climb the pirate hierarchy is by filling dead men's shoes - or in this instance, the tatty sandals of a sloshed gnome. Convincing Tibbs that Kree-Kraw is more than just a hideous apparition conjured by his addled brain (and that the evil birdman intends to peck out his eyes and devour the sweet, sweet octal jelly), the murderous warrizard waits for the panicking gnome to totter precariously close to the edge of the aerie - before giving him a discrete nudge over the side. Giffer Tibbs plummets 60ft and splatters blood all over Captain Harrigan's nice, clean deck. Stark (who refused to participate in the climbing challenge) crawls over to the body/smear and (to the crew's surprise and abject horror) begins to perform a messy autopsy right there and then. Pulling handfuls of glistening entrails out of the gnomes gaping chest cavity, the Dhampir doctor displays the poor fellow's blackened liver as evidence of the lookout's heavy drinking, which surely caused his tragic tumble to the uncompromising deck. Thanks to Stark's little pantomime, Izi avoids suspicion and the unfortunate demise of Giffer Tibb's is chalked up to misadventure.
While Mister Plugg is impressed by Stark's comprehensive knowledge of diseases of the liver, the Wormwood already has a surgeon (Habbly Quarne, who doubles as the ship's carpenter), so the Dhampir is stuck being a swab. Since the unexpected death of Giffer Tibbs has created another vacancy amongst the riggers, Izi persuades the First Mate to assign him the post.
After the morning's excitement, the PC's are assigned their chores. Kree-Kraw returns to the crows-nest to act as the ship's lookout and Izi is tasked with mainsail duty, while Ambrose Kroop thrusts a fishing rod into Inego's hands and sets her to catching fish for the Captain's supper. As the cook slips into a drunken torpor, his new assistant conducts a thorough search of the galley and turns up a dagger and enough rat poison to really ruin someone's day. Stark is given the job of hauling heavy coils of rope across the ship, a task he complains he cannot complete, as the coarse fibres will blister his delicate skin. Neither Mister Plugg nor Master Scourge prove particularly sympathetic to the Dhampir's plight and eventually they weary of his whining and confine him to the sweat-box.
Come dusk, the entire crew assemble on deck to witness the keelhauling of Jakes Magpie, who was caught stealing from the quartermaster's stores. After being dragged against the barnacle-encrusted hull of the Wormwood, what is hauled from the water on the opposite side of the ship does not bear description. Mister Plugg warns his audience that the same sentence will be passed on anyone fool enough to disobey the Captain's rules.
Despite that gruesome spectacle, the PC's find their appetite undiminished and tuck into their evening meal. Kree-Kraw chats to a surly Rahadoumi pirate, while Izi puts the moves on a squint-eyed old fishwife with no shoes. Stark is released from the sweat-box feeling invigorated after spending an afternoon out of the sun. Mister Plugg wonders if the sweat-box is working properly and if not, did Captain Harrigan keep the receipt?
As evening draws in, most of the crew begin to carouse and gamble and sing lewd songs, while a minority slip below-decks for a spot of care-free buggery. Trying his best to ignore the disturbing noises from the next hammock, Kree-Kraw pokes around the lower-hold and chances upon the peculiar articles that Stark left in his box. The thieving Tengu helps himself to the Dhampir's long coat and stylish, tinted lenses. Meanwhile, Stark is lurking in the dark and foetid bilges, hunting rats with which to sate his monstrous thirst for blood. Inego eavesdrops on Ambrose Kroop and Cut-Throat Grok (the quartermaster) and learns that the PC's gear (stolen when they were press-ganged) is being stored under lock and key in Grok's storeroom.
The next morning, the party are prevented from reporting to duty, when 4 mean-looking pirates (Fipps Chumlett, a bald bully / Jaundiced Jape, mute, albino half-orc / Slippery Sy Lonnergan, weasel-faced scallywag / Aretta Bansion, former prostitute) waylay them in the middle-hold. Kree-Kraw baits Chumlett into swinging the first punch, after making some unflattering observations, re: the man's mother.
Izi shows his quality by immediately trying to plant a boot in Chumlett's balls, only for the bald brawler and his half-orc mate to pile on top of him. He manages to escape the scrum long enough to deliver a punch powerful enough to put Chumlett down for the count. Kree-Kraw trades blows with Sy Lonnergan, while Inego and Aretta flail at one another in a generally ineffectual - yet borderline erotic - fashion (all that's missing is a paddling pool full of jelly). The Drow manages to shove the retired harlot into the reach of the simple-minded giant chained to the fore-mast, who snatches a handful of her hair and reels her in. Jape and Lonnergan break for the deck, abandoning Chumlett and Aretta to their doom. The party decide to delay their retribution until after Master Scourge has called the register - not that any of them would have tried to part Mr Plugg's pet idiot from his new playmate (the brute is stroking the struggling woman's hair as a child would a puppy).
Stark avoided the entire fracas, preferring to cower in his comfortable crate, where it is dark and safe.
Thus begins Day 2 aboard the Wormwood!
As the morning bell rings, Izi and Kree-Kraw scramble onto deck - moments before Master Scourge can challenge them over their punctuality. Inego is less fortunate. As she steps over Fipps Chumlett's recumbent form, the vengeful brute snatches at her ankle, delaying the Drow just long enough to earn her a whipping during that evening's Bloody Hour.
Sandara Quinn beckons the party over to a secluded area of the middle hold and hands them back several items of their personal gear that she was able to recover from the quartermaster's stores (she convinced Cut Throat Grok that the objects were cursed). Kree-Kraw is grateful to have his lockpicks restored, yet the rest of the group remain suspicious that Quinn's apparent act act of charity is not as selfless as she might like them to believe.
Before the evening's meal, Inego Montoya, Fipps Chumlett and Aretta Bansion are lined up to face the consequences of their earlier tardiness. While the lashing that Chumlett and Bansion receive seems lacklustre, Master Scourge really puts his back into Inego's punishment and whips her bare back into a bloody ruin. The unconscious Drow must be carried down to her hammock, where Stark does what he can to ease her suffering.
Several days later, a young swab named Jack Scrimshaw (who seems less of a bastard than the rest of Harrigan's crew) is attacked and bitten by something lurking amidst the Wormwood's cargo. Mister Plugg assigns the PC's to pest control duty and sends them below to exterminate the mysterious stowaway. They soon discover that the middle hold is infested with dire rats (monstrous rodents with the build and temperament of rottweilers), which have gnawed their way out of a crate the Wormwood took on back in Port Peril. The verminous host is just as dissatisfied to find itself upon the high seas as the PC's had been when they first awoke. The party make short work of the dire rats and Ambrose Kroop emerges from the galley to claim the bodies for the evening meal. Stark retreats to a quiet corner and drains the bodily fluids from several of the dead rodents.
That evening, Mister Plugg hauls his pet idiot, the simple-minded brute Owlbear Hartsthorne onto the deck for a bit of sport. The First Mate offers a 100gp reward to any crewman who is able to beat the bigger man in a bout of fisticuffs. None of the PC's rise to the challenge, but Izi puts Chumlett's name forward in such a way that the bald bully cannot back down without looking like a big girl's blouse in front of the whole crew. Izi and Inego do everything they can to drive the crowd of onlooking pirates into a frenzy. All their shouting and jeering upsets Owlbear (who just wants to be left alone really), provoking him into a spastic rage. Picking up a heavy belaying pin, Owlbear caves in one side of Chumlett's face with the improvised bludgeon, then proceeds to smash the bald man's skull into an unrecognisable mess, before Mister Plugg and his sycophants can drag him off and chain him back to the mast.
During all the excitement, Kree-Kraw slipped away unseen and picked the lock on Chumlett's locker. The original notion had been to plant an item belonging to Chumlett amongst Sy Lonnergan's gear, driving a wedge between the two scoundrels - but all the group's careful planning was for naught, as poor Fipps Chumlett is no longer in any position to make much of a fuss over the theft of a few trinkets.
While Chumlett's skull is being pulverised beneath Owlbear's meaty fists, Stark goes looking for Jack Scrimshaw, hoping to treat the lad's wounded arm. Unfortunately, the boy is already in the none-too tender care of the ship's surgeon (Habbly Quarne), who has decided to amputate the injured limb. Stark is infuriated by this senseless mutilation of an otherwise hale and healthy shipmate, but Quarne pays him no mind - and soon the Dhampir's objections are drowned out by screams as the bloodthirsty sawbones hacks off Scrimshaw's arm.
Over the next few days, the weather turns from fine to foul and a dreadful storm rolls in without warning, necessitating all hands on deck just to keep the Wormwood afloat. A huge wave of briny water sweeps Rosie Cusswell overboard - fortunately, Stark and Izi both spot the struggling halfling splashing helplessly in the ship's wake. Izi throws her a lifeline and together they pull the half-drowned bard to safety. The Dhampir applies CPR (how this works, when he doesn't breathe, I cannot begin to fathom....) and after retching up a lungful of seawater, Rosie Cusswell thanks him for saving her life, before lapsing into an exhausted slumber. Mister Plugg and Master Scourge are none too pleased to witness Stark doctoring, especially after Quarne lodged a complaint against him for interfering in the after-care of poor, one-armed Jack Scrimshaw. Stark is reminded that there is only one surgeon aboard the Wormwood - and it isn't him. If the ship's officers catch him offering any more medical aid to the crew, he will face dire repercussions!
During all the excitement, Kree-Kraw slipped away unseen and picked the lock on Chumlett's locker. The original notion had been to plant an item belonging to Chumlett amongst Sy Lonnergan's gear, driving a wedge between the two scoundrels - but all the group's careful planning was for naught, as poor Fipps Chumlett is no longer in any position to make much of a fuss over the theft of a few trinkets.
While Chumlett's skull is being pulverised beneath Owlbear's meaty fists, Stark goes looking for Jack Scrimshaw, hoping to treat the lad's wounded arm. Unfortunately, the boy is already in the none-too tender care of the ship's surgeon (Habbly Quarne), who has decided to amputate the injured limb. Stark is infuriated by this senseless mutilation of an otherwise hale and healthy shipmate, but Quarne pays him no mind - and soon the Dhampir's objections are drowned out by screams as the bloodthirsty sawbones hacks off Scrimshaw's arm.
Over the next few days, the weather turns from fine to foul and a dreadful storm rolls in without warning, necessitating all hands on deck just to keep the Wormwood afloat. A huge wave of briny water sweeps Rosie Cusswell overboard - fortunately, Stark and Izi both spot the struggling halfling splashing helplessly in the ship's wake. Izi throws her a lifeline and together they pull the half-drowned bard to safety. The Dhampir applies CPR (how this works, when he doesn't breathe, I cannot begin to fathom....) and after retching up a lungful of seawater, Rosie Cusswell thanks him for saving her life, before lapsing into an exhausted slumber. Mister Plugg and Master Scourge are none too pleased to witness Stark doctoring, especially after Quarne lodged a complaint against him for interfering in the after-care of poor, one-armed Jack Scrimshaw. Stark is reminded that there is only one surgeon aboard the Wormwood - and it isn't him. If the ship's officers catch him offering any more medical aid to the crew, he will face dire repercussions!
The next morning dawns bright and sunny in the aftermath of the squall and a shallow reef is spotted off the Wormwood's port-side. The PC's are summoned onto deck (once again, Stark is bandaged from head > toe in crisp linen, to preserve his skin from the sun's harsh glare) and issued with crab-pots. Apparently, Captain Harrigan has an insatiable hunger for crispy crab's legs - and the PC's are to replenish the galley's dwindling stores, before the next leg of their piratical adventure sees the Wormwood sailing into less bountiful waters. Conchobhar Turlach Shortstone III (the gnomish dandy) is sent with them (simply to get him out from under foot), while Master Scourge watches them balefully as they row across to the reef in one of the ship's smaller jolly-boats.
After baiting their pots, the party enjoy the sunshine - all except Stark, who huddles in the shade of his parasol. Shortstone heroically perseveres in his attempted seduction of Inego Montoya, despite her cold and unwavering indifference to his charms.
Izi Yamamoto spots a sunken wreck not far from where their crab-pots lie - yet few of the PC's can actually swim (despite being told weeks in advance that this would be a seafaring campaign). Inego and Shortstone strip off and dive into the clear water, descending to explore the submerged vessel. In the (former) Captain's cabin, they find a chest laden with (800) gold coins - and a sealed, watertight scroll case, inscribed with glowing arcane symbols. Inego realises that the party could never hope to smuggle this much treasure back aboard the Wormwood under Mister Plugg's nose, yet this doesn't stop Shortstone stuffing his pockets full of coin, nor she from tucking the scroll case into her belt. Emerging from the wreck, they are ambushed by a giant crab, that catches Shortstone in it's oversized, vice-like pincers! Almost out of air, Inego considers leaving the lecherous gnome to his horrible fate - but instead swims to his rescue, hacking at the crab's vulnerable eye-stalks until it relinquishes its prize and scuttles back into the depths of the reef. When Inego breaks the surface, the rest of the party heave the mortally wounded gnome into the jolly-boat, where Stark pronounces him dead and Kree-Kraw immediately and unashamedly ransacks the corpse, before tipping him back over the side.
After baiting their pots, the party enjoy the sunshine - all except Stark, who huddles in the shade of his parasol. Shortstone heroically perseveres in his attempted seduction of Inego Montoya, despite her cold and unwavering indifference to his charms.
Izi Yamamoto spots a sunken wreck not far from where their crab-pots lie - yet few of the PC's can actually swim (despite being told weeks in advance that this would be a seafaring campaign). Inego and Shortstone strip off and dive into the clear water, descending to explore the submerged vessel. In the (former) Captain's cabin, they find a chest laden with (800) gold coins - and a sealed, watertight scroll case, inscribed with glowing arcane symbols. Inego realises that the party could never hope to smuggle this much treasure back aboard the Wormwood under Mister Plugg's nose, yet this doesn't stop Shortstone stuffing his pockets full of coin, nor she from tucking the scroll case into her belt. Emerging from the wreck, they are ambushed by a giant crab, that catches Shortstone in it's oversized, vice-like pincers! Almost out of air, Inego considers leaving the lecherous gnome to his horrible fate - but instead swims to his rescue, hacking at the crab's vulnerable eye-stalks until it relinquishes its prize and scuttles back into the depths of the reef. When Inego breaks the surface, the rest of the party heave the mortally wounded gnome into the jolly-boat, where Stark pronounces him dead and Kree-Kraw immediately and unashamedly ransacks the corpse, before tipping him back over the side.
That evening, the party put their heads together and contemplate poisoning the ship's surgeon/carpenter (by serving him dire rat liver that's been left to fester in the bilge), while Inego retires to the galley and bakes meringues for Cut Throat Grok, after Kroop let slip that the quartermaster suffers from a sweet tooth. Bribing the half-orc with sugary treats, Inego manages to recover most of her starting gear. Inspired, Kree-Kraw trades a (stolen, obviously) bottle of potent grog for his own equipment.
With the Wormwood entering a major shipping lane, Captain Harrigan decrees that the new swabs be prepared for the imminent prospect of a hostile boarding action. Riaris Krine, the ship's foul-mouthed master gunner, rows the party out in a jolly-boat and instructs them to rappel up the side of the Wormwood, while several pirates (Jaundiced Jape, Slippery Sy Lonnergan, Crimson Cogward & one-armed Jack Scrimshaw) attempt to repel them, to better simulate the conditions of an actual ship-to-ship combat. Having befriended the ship's cook, Inego has been gifted with Kroop's steadfast grapple, a magical hook that never misses its target, to help her during this challenge. As Kree-Kraw, Izi and Inego begin their ascent, Stark hangs back and notices Master Scourge tipping a bucket of bloody entrails into the water. Already, several sleek, grey fins are cutting through the waves, towards the Wormwood. Despite Lonnergan's spirited effort to dislodge him from his rope, Kree-Kraw is first to gain the deck, the Tengu immediately moves to help haul Stark up, as several dark, predatory shadows gather in the water beneath the Dhampir. Suddenly - Lonnergan lunges past him and cuts Stark's line! The Dhampir - who cannot swim - disappears beneath the surface as the frenzied sharks converge. Lonnergan's smug grin is soon wiped off his ferret-like face when Kree-Kraw pushes him over the side to 'rescue' Stark. Inego uses her steadfast grapple to hook the drowning Dhampir and together, she, Izi and Kree-Kraw haul him out of the drink. This proves more arduous than anticipated, as a hungry shark is gnawing on Stark's leg and will not let go. Meanwhile, the other three shark's tear Lonnergan apart and the water is stained red with his blood.
Eventually, Stark and his fishy friend are heaved onto the deck. Inego guts the shark and is surprised when the partially digested body of Conchobhar Turlach Shortstone III spills out of the creature's stomach.
With the Wormwood entering a major shipping lane, Captain Harrigan decrees that the new swabs be prepared for the imminent prospect of a hostile boarding action. Riaris Krine, the ship's foul-mouthed master gunner, rows the party out in a jolly-boat and instructs them to rappel up the side of the Wormwood, while several pirates (Jaundiced Jape, Slippery Sy Lonnergan, Crimson Cogward & one-armed Jack Scrimshaw) attempt to repel them, to better simulate the conditions of an actual ship-to-ship combat. Having befriended the ship's cook, Inego has been gifted with Kroop's steadfast grapple, a magical hook that never misses its target, to help her during this challenge. As Kree-Kraw, Izi and Inego begin their ascent, Stark hangs back and notices Master Scourge tipping a bucket of bloody entrails into the water. Already, several sleek, grey fins are cutting through the waves, towards the Wormwood. Despite Lonnergan's spirited effort to dislodge him from his rope, Kree-Kraw is first to gain the deck, the Tengu immediately moves to help haul Stark up, as several dark, predatory shadows gather in the water beneath the Dhampir. Suddenly - Lonnergan lunges past him and cuts Stark's line! The Dhampir - who cannot swim - disappears beneath the surface as the frenzied sharks converge. Lonnergan's smug grin is soon wiped off his ferret-like face when Kree-Kraw pushes him over the side to 'rescue' Stark. Inego uses her steadfast grapple to hook the drowning Dhampir and together, she, Izi and Kree-Kraw haul him out of the drink. This proves more arduous than anticipated, as a hungry shark is gnawing on Stark's leg and will not let go. Meanwhile, the other three shark's tear Lonnergan apart and the water is stained red with his blood.
Eventually, Stark and his fishy friend are heaved onto the deck. Inego guts the shark and is surprised when the partially digested body of Conchobhar Turlach Shortstone III spills out of the creature's stomach.
Inego busies herself crafting a somewhat gristly necklace out of the shark's pointy teeth, Kree-Kraw and Stark retire to the lower hold to get some shut-eye. Mister Plugg and Master Scourge catch Izi on his lonesome and escort him down to the bilges, on the slender pretence that his assistance is required to pump out excess water the Wormwood took on during the recent storm. After shoving Izi through the trapdoor, Scourge and Plugg cover it with a heavy barrel and saunter off, cackling maniacally. In the dark, foetid bilge, Izi is immediately set upon by assassins (Jaundiced Jape and another of Scourge's lackeys, a hideous dwarf with no nose), acting upon the First Mate's murderous instruction. Finding himself at a distinct disadvantage (trying to blindly fend off two opponents with darkvision), Izi drops his knife and falls back on good old fashioned fireballs, praying that the hull is too sodden to catch flame. His first bolt misses Jape - the second hits the dwarf smack between the eyes, burning a plate-sized crater into his face.
And there we left it, with Izi Yamamato fighting for his life, alone in the dark underbelly of the ship....
In the dark, foetid bilge of the vessel, Izi Yamamato continues to doggedly pursue his single-minded slaughter of the Wormwood's pirate crew. Having blown a plate-sized hole in Narwhal Tate's (already pretty hideous) face, the warrior-wizard hurls a second fireball at Jaundiced Jape, which removes the albino half-orc's head. The stump of his pale neck smokes as the muscular body totters then falls. On the lower deck, Kree-Kraw finally manages to heave the heavy barrel off the trapdoor and surveys the scene of carnage below, demanding explanations. Izi Yamamoto shrugs casually as he weighs the two (semi-headless) bodies down with ballast, until both have vanished beneath the filthy bilge-water.
It is not long before Master Scourge returns to congratulate his murderous minions. The wicked taskmaster is unpleasantly surprised to find Izi hale, healthy and dutifully at his post - while Jape and Tate are conspicuous only by their absence. Suspecting foul(er) play, Scourge has Izi confined to the sweat-box until the disappearance of the two missing crewmen can be thoroughly investigated. Once the crew has been assembled, Mister Plugg organises the search for the two missing pirates. Since Plugg and Scourge orchestrated the ambush, they both suspect Izi has killed the two would-be assassins, the only question is: where has he concealed their bodies?
Realising that it is only a matter of time before the bilges are probed and the corpses discovered, Stark embarks upon a somewhat nauseating course of action, one that could only have occurred to someone with his vampiric lineage. (Pat's plan here was so absolutely alien and abhorrent to my sensibilities, that my mind could not at first encompass it in all its horrible splendour). Rushing below, the Dhampir recovers the two headless cadavers and further mutilates the dead flesh to make the mortal wounds look less like the results of offensive sorcery and more like injuries caused by the gnawing of the giant rats that plague the ship.
He also produces the body of a dire rat from where he had stored it for later consumption and delivers all three gristly articles to Mister Plugg. Justifiably dubious that rats killed these two pirates, Plugg summons Habbly Quarne to examine the bodies. The incompetent surgeon/carpenter conducts a cursory examination of the two bodies before declaring that (although the ragged bite-marks look more like human teeth than those of a rodent) Stark's hypothesis is likely to be accurate. The bodies are thrown overboard, Plugg assigns additional men to the rat-catching teams sweeping the lower hold and Izi is grudgingly released from the sweat-box. Foiled in their attempt to kill the upstart landlubber, Mister Plugg and Master Scourge glare balefully at Izi Yamamoto as he rejoins his friends.
And there we left it, with Izi Yamamato fighting for his life, alone in the dark underbelly of the ship....
In the dark, foetid bilge of the vessel, Izi Yamamato continues to doggedly pursue his single-minded slaughter of the Wormwood's pirate crew. Having blown a plate-sized hole in Narwhal Tate's (already pretty hideous) face, the warrior-wizard hurls a second fireball at Jaundiced Jape, which removes the albino half-orc's head. The stump of his pale neck smokes as the muscular body totters then falls. On the lower deck, Kree-Kraw finally manages to heave the heavy barrel off the trapdoor and surveys the scene of carnage below, demanding explanations. Izi Yamamoto shrugs casually as he weighs the two (semi-headless) bodies down with ballast, until both have vanished beneath the filthy bilge-water.
It is not long before Master Scourge returns to congratulate his murderous minions. The wicked taskmaster is unpleasantly surprised to find Izi hale, healthy and dutifully at his post - while Jape and Tate are conspicuous only by their absence. Suspecting foul(er) play, Scourge has Izi confined to the sweat-box until the disappearance of the two missing crewmen can be thoroughly investigated. Once the crew has been assembled, Mister Plugg organises the search for the two missing pirates. Since Plugg and Scourge orchestrated the ambush, they both suspect Izi has killed the two would-be assassins, the only question is: where has he concealed their bodies?
Realising that it is only a matter of time before the bilges are probed and the corpses discovered, Stark embarks upon a somewhat nauseating course of action, one that could only have occurred to someone with his vampiric lineage. (Pat's plan here was so absolutely alien and abhorrent to my sensibilities, that my mind could not at first encompass it in all its horrible splendour). Rushing below, the Dhampir recovers the two headless cadavers and further mutilates the dead flesh to make the mortal wounds look less like the results of offensive sorcery and more like injuries caused by the gnawing of the giant rats that plague the ship.
He also produces the body of a dire rat from where he had stored it for later consumption and delivers all three gristly articles to Mister Plugg. Justifiably dubious that rats killed these two pirates, Plugg summons Habbly Quarne to examine the bodies. The incompetent surgeon/carpenter conducts a cursory examination of the two bodies before declaring that (although the ragged bite-marks look more like human teeth than those of a rodent) Stark's hypothesis is likely to be accurate. The bodies are thrown overboard, Plugg assigns additional men to the rat-catching teams sweeping the lower hold and Izi is grudgingly released from the sweat-box. Foiled in their attempt to kill the upstart landlubber, Mister Plugg and Master Scourge glare balefully at Izi Yamamoto as he rejoins his friends.